Taken from the new book "They call me naughty Lola," by David Rose, featuring genuine lonely heart advertisements in a noted London newspaper. Published by Profile Books UK. All copyrights acknowledged.
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"Tired of feeling patronized by the ads in this column? Then I'm not the woman for you, little man. Today you may be benighted and insignificant, tomorrow you'll be even more so. Now, off you go. "
"Bald, short, fat and ugly male, 53, seeks short-sighted woman with tremendous sexual appetite. "
"Romance is dead. So is my mother. Man, 42, inherited wealth, seeks…"
"Slut in the kitchen, chef in the bedroom. Woman with mixed priorities (37) seeks man who can toss a good salad. "
"Bastard – complete and utter. Whatever you do, don't reply – you'll only regret it. (Man, 38) "
"My mind is a globe of excitement. My heart is an atlas of generosity. My body is a map of struggle. You can camp-out on the flat heaths, but careful where you tread and remember to close all gates behind you. Akela of desire (F 38) seeks orienteering male to 45 for nights of bluster and queuing for the showers... "
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